Honestly, Im not sure theres much you can do except to listen and redirect, gently, the focus away from the pain and devastation shes feeling. I do try to hangout with her and try relaxing things at night. She acknowledged she had received and read. I feel anger and guilt and shame altogether. And I am sure that if I had just walked, they would be easier to deal with. This thread is very old now so it may be too late to add my voice in any meaningful way. It wont hurt and it might make you better. He did his best to comfort me and to nurture me. She has been the most beautiful, kind and loving person to me and all my wonderful family. Im glad you found us.Just so you know Ive very in tune with wording sometimes. Being victimized and just being a victim are two different things. The period in which a couple feels 'in love' during an affair normally.
I was finally able to get into the iCloud and had the raw data dump. Do not let him turn the tables on you anymore. They just moved on as if nothing happened and forgot about it but I cant. But now I know im not crazy its just my defence mechanism I let the emotions flow, I go back to DDay, and when it all calmes dawn I try thinking of something nice (I have a picture of my kids on my phone. Also, previous unrelated trauma makes things worse, as in my case. Hopefully with treatment the pain will ease.
